I'm having a slightly difficult time.

I've been cast in the Gaffer's film, and I did bug him to cast me in something and he found me the part of the manky-toothed old lady in it. There are two super hot girls that are doing the other two female characters.

I shouldn't be petty, it's business, but I am hurt. I can't pretend I'm not. I think I might have mentioned this before, I can't remember. It's just becoming more present because this is shooting week for me. I have one day on set tomorrow. I have two hours of makeup, and there's a problem because my skin doesn't take the latex aging well, since it's too tight and, well, youthful. It just won't wrinkle.

He even wanted to put me in those huge black sunglasses that old people wear, thereby rendering an actor's greatest asset in a silent film, the eyes, useless. Luckily, makeup nixed them, citing the only way to make me look older is going to be around the eyes, since my cheeks won't wrinkle well.

He also got me a really bad old lady wig. It was $2, and it shows.

I know I'm a character actor to some degree, but he just caved to public pressures and the current filmmaking trends. He's got it ingrained that people won't buy it if a male character falls in love with a pretty, yet chubby character. He told me it's just business.

I really think that if enough filmmakers cast people like me more, it'll become more accepted. It's not unbelievable that someone could be love-at-first-site smitten by a heavier girl like me.

Anyway, it's my own ego, I know. It's my own issues, I'm just tired of the stereotype being met. Makes me really sad. I just want to get this shoot over with.

I have to go back to working now.