My hand started to stink yesterday and the skin is absolutely black in parts because of the silver Acticoat stuff they put on me. It looks like hair dye. My fingers, when they were released from the saran wrap, looked like they belonged on a six week waterlogged corpse, all white and bloated and weird. Zombie fingers!!

My classes end this week. I have two left. It also occurs, then, that my Psych exam is next week too. SHIT.

I don't even know what's on it. Better look. Ok I looked.

I feel a bit limbo bound... Like once school is finished, I'm not going to try particularly hard on the old acting front. I need to make a plan in which I work out in some respect every day. I have to start to train for the sunrun, which is in three weeks. I don't wanna drag my sorry lame ass through 10k without preparing at least a little bit for it.

I just stare at things these days. I walk, I rent movies, I overindulge in garbage food. I don't shop anymore, that's good. So I've substituted one excess for another. I read, I sleep, I hang out. There aren't a lot of people I hang out with these days. Everyone is mostly paired off and they hang out with themselves. I hang out with the ones that aren't paired off, mostly. Not intentionally, we're just the ones that have nothing else to do.

I called the Gaffer when I was sad and burnt and on morphine. He rang back but I wasn't home, and now the moment's passed. A new week has started, and it's back to how it was, where we don't speak because I can't handle being his friend.

My father is trying to shoehorn his way back in too, and sending ridiculous emails. I don't have room to care.

Today? Clean my disgusting house (sick and injured = not a lot of tidying this week), transfer a gym membership, work. Pretty easy day, wouldn't you say?

They all are.