We went to Whistler yesterday to check out the scenario, price out staff housing, see what kind of job options we might have for January.

I'm going to move back there for four months. Maybe.

I used to live there ten years ago. Who knew I'd want to go back. The naked mountains made me hurt for snow, and I remembered the happiest moment in my life, when I rode a perfect powder day in the sunshine. Everyone has one moment in their lives when they remember being the happiest, the purest of happy. It was there, on the Peak of Whistler, for me.

I could work solid for four months on the mountain, snowboard, write. It would be the perfect break from school.

The weird part? We would live together there. Share a room. We would be living together, as a couple.

How do you plan that now? How do you plan that when he's not ready to leap straight into another relationship?

So now I'm backing away because I don't want to get steamrolled.

And in the meantime, while he plays the field, so do I.

Hello Pender Harbour. See you Monday night Anna. I am SWIMMING IN THAT LAKE.

NAKED. Hey where's the phosphoresence? I probably spelled that wrong.

It's annoying to find that all this time, I've wanted a partner in crime, yet when one sorta presents itself, I panic and check out my other options.

I so don't want to make the wrong decision. And I'm prone to that, only to find out much later, when it's too late, and I am steamrolled.