I flip flop between saying fuck it and never wanting to see or talk to him again, and panicking because losing him would suck so much and consequently I want to try to just relax and be OK with his needed selfishness.

Maybe he SHOULD get with someone else. That would be the test. Does he miss me, or miss his ex more or realize that neither of us are what he wants?

It's a dangerous game of something that shouldn't be a game at all.

So really I have to choose between shitty and shitty. It's a lose lose situation.