I'm feeling really cut off. I need to go away on holiday.

I'm not looking forward to this weekend anymore. I don't know why, just, the anticipation vaporized and now I just want it to be next week. Or maybe even August. I wish it were August.

I watched Lion in Winter, which was fantastic - Katharine Hepburn and Peter O'Toole. They don't make actresses like that anymore. Not even me, and I wish I could say that I was that amazing, that powerful. But I never had that four year steady formal theatre training that I wish I had. I would go now, but it's too much time and money.

I'm not as good as I think. Probably not.

There's something wrong in my life that I'm this depressed lately. Usually my bouts last a day or so. This one is enduring and it's scaring me.

I'm going in search of food.